Why "creating a policy" is often just a symptom of leadership insecurity.
I found two founders in a heated debate on our new office terrace: one was a smoker, one was not. The debate was about creating a strict, company-wide smoking policy to preemptively avoid potential friction.
Founders spending their time debating the "physics of smoke" and crafting rules for a problem that hadn't even manifested yet is the definition of a high-cost, low-yield activity.
By creating a policy, the founders were signaling to the team that they were incapable of navigating social norms without a "rulebook." It encourages people to learn how to game the rules rather than solve the problem.
Intervening in human interactions with blanket policies degrades the environment. Here is how we untangled this via Self-Determination Theory:
We left the resolution to the team. By letting smokers and non-smokers negotiate, they own the outcome, which creates more sustainable solutions than a top-down decree.
Healthy conflict is part of professional growth. Policing it creates distance; navigating it builds trust and mutual respect between colleagues.
Trusting adults to solve their own interpersonal frictions reinforces the idea that they are capable, functional professionals—not children requiring supervision.
The founders were worried about a "problem" that didn't exist, while ignoring the very real problem that our presentation for the team was 30 minutes away and we weren't ready.
Stop policing, start prioritizing. If a problem can't be settled by the people involved, then you intervene. Until then, stay out of it. You hired adults; treat them like it.